Arizona.

 

(Landing at O'hare for a layover, check out Chicago's skyline) 

 This is another older post. Week six post- delivery I headed off to Arizona. Laura has been my friend longer than anyone else, she's family. Her husband was recently given orders to be stationed in Tucson, Arizona, on Davis-Monthan Air Force Base. I recommend each of you should take a trip out there to see the boneyard.. you won't regret it! The boneyard has more than 4,400 aircraft, which makes it the largest aircraft storage and preservation facility in the world.They even give public tours.

(another window seat photo from the plane)

 Laura had helped me through a lot during my pregnancy and never sugar coated anything. It was weird for her knowing I had been pregnant and given birth to a beautiful girl, yet here I was standing in front of her, no preggo belly and no baby, like nothing had happened. I had nothing to show for my experiences other than a C-section scar no thicker than a pencil line. 

Being around her and her family has always been very healing for me. We rock out to music and talk about old times. I get to laugh and cuddle with her five year old son Corbin and her five year old nephew Christian.  In her own way, she's adopted Christian into their lives to help give him everything he needs right now when his mom isn't in a place to be able to do that right now.

There were a few moments where Christian would reach for my hand or curl up to read a book and I thought about how I was going to miss out on those experiences with BB. I read those boys so many books one evening that my voice went hoarse. I loved it. It was also magical because it's rare to have two five-year old boys sit still at the same time for any amount of time let alone more than an hour or two.

Even through the moments of sadness I've never regretted my choice or questioned it.

 Christian touring the boneyard :)

 Out hiking in the Sonoran Desert. 

 Hiking up to Seven Falls

 

Can you see the teeny tiny people for reference? 

Being out in the Desert was incredibly peaceful and healing. 

 At the Botanical Gardens in Tucson. The boys took this picture without cutting our heads off... haha!

 Corbin and I rocking our sunglasses. 

It was a sad flight home. I already missed the mountain views in any direction you would look and the wide open sky. I already missed my friend and her sweet family. I flew home with a beautiful blanket Laura crocheted for BB. I also lucked out having the middle seat open. 

I cracked open my book, "Dear Birth Mother, Thank You for our Baby," and let the tears stream down my face as something I read resonated to my core. I doubt the waves of sadness will ever go completely away but I welcome those moments now. Next up: my return to work! *dun dun dun!*